The last week or so has not been much fun for Arsenal fans. In fact, I would liken it to being made prisoner in Guantanamo, shackled to a stinking, piss stained hobo, being force fed nits farmed from the head of a crusty, dreadlocked anti-globalism campaigner, locked in a damp room with posters of nude Teddy Sheringham all over the walls, having a really slow dial-up internet connection which half loaded every page you tried, all the while being blasted with that fucking Wet Wet Wet song that was number one for half a year.
I don’t want to even contemplate defeat to the Mugsmashers tonight. It would be like all of the above with added enjoyment of being digitally violated by Hellboy. So, losing tonight is simply unthinkable. And while we’re content to wallow in our own crunchy-nitted misery, it can’t be much fun for the players either. They’ll know they’ve failed two rather important tests and the ambitions they have of winning the league are fading fast. They will want to react tonight to stay in touch, just about, with Chelsea and United, but to at least maintain the gap we have over 4th place.
We don’t have much in the way of the team news, which is a bit depressing, but unsurprising. There’s no Eduardo, he might be back for Porto so his ‘small, small, small’ hamstring problem was a bit more than that. Nicklas Bendtner is considered a bit too unfit to start the game, which again is a disappointment, meaning we’ll be trying to out-titch Liverpool up top. It hasn’t exactly produced results in the last two games but we’ve got to hope for third time lucky.
In the very cold light of day I suppose you can look back at the Chelsea game and think that both the goals we conceded were preventable. If we had defended better. If we hadn’t made stupid decisions and mistakes. I know, if my Aunty had balls, and all that, but that is the truth of it. If it were me picking the team tonight I would inclined to change things around at the back a bit. I wouldn’t be surprised to see Eboue start at right back anyway. Sagna is carrying an injury and didn’t last the 90 against Chelsea or United. Either way though I think Gael Clichy needs to spend some time on the bench, so with that in mind I’d be inclined to bring in Sol Campbell at centre-half and move either Gallas or Vermaelen to left back.
People might think ‘But they’re so good together! They make a fantastic couple!’ but while both have impressed individually at times this season, particulary through their contribution to the goalscoring, it’s not as if they’ve been rock solid as a partnership. Both of them have played at left back before so it wouldn’t be asking them to do something new and perhaps the experience, organisation and stature of Campbell might shore things up at the back a bit.
The Mugshmashers are coming to the Grove tonight with us clearly in their sights. A few weeks back that was unthinkable which is, you have to say, a sign of how quickly things can change this season. A win for them (no, Hellboy! Noooo!), would leave them just two points behind us. Steven Gerrard says we are a wounded animal. I’m hoping we’re one of those wounded animals that is lying pitifully on the road, limp, barely breathing, a trickle of blood coming from its ear and/or nose, and when a kindly motorist stops to offer it help, the animal comes to life and goes ‘Raaarrrggghhhh’ before eating the most of the motorists face with one savage bite. I’m glad they won at the weekend, the last thing we wanted was them coming to play us on the back of a Merseyside derby defeat, having to react to that. Not that they’ll be complacent, they’re beginning to find some momentum, it’s up to us to stop it.
I grow tired of saying we need a big game from Andrei Arshavin, I’m hoping that the Russian will find some kind of form tonight, but if he doesn’t somebody else is going to have to step up and find the goals. Just one in our last three Premier League games, Vermaelen’s deflected effort against United, and we need to start scoring again. Perhaps it’s down to the lack of a striker, but a tetchy Arsene Wenger spoke yesterday in his press conference about this. He said he tried to sign new players (although denied reports about Thomas Sorensen) and looked a bit cross when he insisted our problems in recent games were more ‘defensive than offensive’.
That is certainly true but defensive mistakes are easier to cope with when you’ve got more of a threat up the other end of the pitch. Nevertheless, we’ll have to take him at his word. He at least tried to sign players. How serious our efforts were nobody but those closest to the action will ever know and enough has been said about it already. He has called for solidarity and we know he’ll never criticise in public players who make mistakes. He won’t be blind to who made them, and how, so hopefully his team selection tonight will go some way to addressing that.
As I said yesterday, a win for us and one or both of the other two slipping up would be the ideal outcome tonight and would make everything a little better. The most important thing though is for us to win, any benefit from the other games is just a bonus, but we have to get ourselves back on track, it’s as simple as that. The players need it, the manager needs it, the fans need it, and whichever XI goes out there tonight has to collectively give everything they’ve got to make sure our season doesn’t continue to be bombarded with Wet Wet Fucking Wet.
In other news there are all kinds of reports that we have agreed a 5 year pre-contract deal with Marouane Chamakh. I have to say at the moment I’m more than underwhelmed by the news. He’s not arriving till next season, if he does come, so there’s not much point in talking about him now. It is worth considering though that his arrival would almost certainly mean the end for one of the strikers already at the club. Who that might be remains to be seen but I suspect it’ll be one of our left footed players.
According to Chairman PHW the board would be more than willing to accomodate a request from the manager to break the ‘over 30s rule’ and offer William Gallas a two year deal. So far that request has not been forthcoming. Personally, I think Gallas will leave in the summer.
I mentioned Arsene’s press conference yesterday. It’s as irritable and grumpy as I have ever seen him. There was a strange atmosphere, you could sense some of the journalists really wanting to stick him with negative questions about his policies and so on, but they were a mix of too afraid and too respectful to do so. The manager was clearly upset that his post-match comments had been taken out of context, allowing the response from Ballack etc, was often on the defensive, and there was nothing like the usual banter and wit going on. Clearly it is linked to the results of the last few games and the criticisms from far and wide of which I’m sure he’s well aware.
There’s only one way to make that better though, improved results. A win against the ‘smashers tonight would make his next press briefing a much more relaxed affair. Here’s hoping they’re all friends again soon.
Come on Arsenal!
