Picture the scene. It is early evening. Two proud parents are seeing their little girl, who has just turned 18, go off on her first night out as an adult.
The proud, bearded and highly, almost psychotically, suspicious of young men father says “Look, kiddo, I know you’re 18 and now legally allowed to drink, but don’t go crazy tonight, eh? Be a little bit sensible if you can”.
The daughter says “I will!” and off she goes.
Some time later that evening, after some drinks have been drinked, the mother, we shall call her … erm … Mrs Clogs … says “Mr Clogs! Get another bottle of wine from the garage!” and the father, this mystical Mr Clogs says “That is a capital idea, let’s!”
And they drink the other bottle of wine. On top of the ones that went before it. All the ones.
“I hope she has good sense tonight”.
“Oh me too”.
“I hope she shows restraint and a bit of cop-on when it comes to drink”
“I too hope that”.
“At least we’ve shown her a good example all these years”
“You’re me besht mateasdhjagdgatr65yhnvhdgttd …… I fuckin hate Puffins, the beaky cunts”.
“Yeah!”
*glug glug*
So welcome to this morning. I hope you’re feeling as happy and chipper as Mr and Mrs Clogs. Whoever they are.
After asking for more time Emmanuel Adebayor has apparently decided that Citeh is the place for him and he’s due to undergo a medical today. This is on top of the medical he apparently had the other day. Man, they’re testing the shit out of him.
Andrei Arshavin isn’t stressed about the imminent departure of a teammate who makes him look like he should be in the Time Bandits. He says:
He is an excellent striker. Everybody knows him and he can score from nothing. But it is his decision whether he wants to stay or he wants to go. We have Arsene. He knows everything. He knows if we need someone then he will buy.
Gunnerblog has more highlights from an interview which appeared somewhere. And is on video. I have vague recollections of trying to watch that last night. I like Arshavin. He’s like a little Time Bandit. As for Adebayor enough has been said about it now. The only comment left to make is when he does actually leave.
Or if he does something extraordinary like hold a press conference in which he announces the launch of his new Blu-ray DVD record label while telling the world he has single-handedly come up with a solution to world hunger (giant pop tarts which can be left out in the sun to toast so you don’t even need a giant toaster) and discovered the final resting place of Shergar (he got knocked off for being mouthy to an IRA leader who didn’t appreciated being told ‘neigh’ by a horse). Then we can comment.
I read on Arsenal Dialysis that Carlos Vela is injured, he has a sprain apparently, and might miss pre-season. I have to say I am somewhat disappointed. Not at this news but because I have always counted on Carlos Vela News to get my news about Carlos Vela. And they had nothing. NOTHING. If you can’t get your Carlos Vela news from Carlos Vela News then there’s something dreadfully wrong with crazy, mixed-up, rag tag world of ours.
There’s not much else to tell you really. So it’s time for me to go, drink more coffee, take some painkillers and be off with myself. Fingers crossed on you know what.
Laters.
