A small *boilk* to begin this Saturday with. A leisurely Saturday. No football till tomorrow. So a day to chill, potter about and then go out and make with the beer for tomorrow’s *boik*
Let’s start with a Cesc update, shall we? In this morning’s Sun he’s given the timescale for his return. He says:
If everything goes to plan, I will be back in action for Arsenal in four weeks.
Hurrah! The idea of Cesc being back in the team makes me make Cesc’s goal-face, as illustrated by the man himself to your right. He goes on to say:
I genuinely believe I will return fitter and stronger than ever as a result of the first long break of my professional career. For the past five years I have never had more than one month’s rest. I am only 21 but have already played more than 250 games for Arsenal and Spain.
So maybe the injury was my body’s way of telling me to take a break.
Ok Cesc’s body, we’ve got the message. You’ve made your point in no uncertain terms. Now, if you don’t mind, we’d like the rest of Cesc back please. I’m not saying for a moment that all our hopes this season are dependent on Cesc but all our hopes this season are dependent on Cesc.
I kid, I kid. But having him back in the side will provide us with a huge boost in quality in an area where we badly need it. Fingers crossed all goes well in the final stages of his recovery and he’s back in the side and back to his best in no time.
Of course you can’t have any good news these days without somebody trying to put a damper on it. We’re all happy Cesc is on his way back but that Armani suited cunthound in Catalunya, Joan Laporta, has stuck his oar in saying Cesc would be a ‘big player’ for Barcelona. Well there’s a fucking genius at work, eh? He continues to state the obvious by telling us Cesc was born there.
Well, there’s a shock. How could we not have known all this time? Obviously Joan (and I pronounce his name as it’s spelt in English, like my Auntie Joan and not ‘Jwan’) Laporta is still more than a bit pissed off that they paid us £12m+ for Hleb, who is getting splinters in his arse from sitting on the bench week in week out and has been bleating to press about how much he’d like to join Bayern Munich.
He’s our captain you interfering, busy-body. I know, I know, you bought our last captain but he was all fucked up in the head, what with his marriage break-up and all that kind of stuff. But Cesc’s marriage is so fine he hasn’t even got married yet.
What I wouldn’t give for a summer without constant fiddling of our special area from Spanish clubs. You know it’s going to happen again. Real Madrid have a presidential election this summer so that’s going to be mayhem with all the candidates promising players from all over.
Candidate 1 – “If elected I promise Kaka, Fabregas, van Persie, Eduardo, Messi and Ronaldo”.
Candidate 2 – “If elected I promise Kaka, Fabregas, van Persie, Eduardo, Messi, Ronaldo and Ibrahimovic”.
Candidate 3 – “If elected I promise Kaka, Fabregas, van Persie, Eduardo, Messi, Ronaldo, Ibrahimovic and Darren Fletcher! And gypsies arms for all!!!”
And so it will go but with more Arsenal players named, probably. Adebayor’s agents will be creaming their fucking pants and getting him to pose with pictures of Spanish newspapers, Spanish flags, weeping a solitary tear over a portrait of Alfredo di Stefano and anything else they can think of.
And while all this is going, Barcelona, having blown the league on the final day of the season will be desperate to keep up with Los Joneses and will join in with gusto. It’s gonna be fucking mayhem, I tell you. Mayhem.
Anyway, that’s all to look forward to in the summer. In the meantime there’s other stuff to keep us occupied.
Gael Clichy talks about the boss and the criticism levelled at AW and the team.
We’ve got the FA Cup game tomorrow as well. There’ll be a bit of changing around in terms of the team, I suspect with one eye on Roma in midweek. The boss has confirmed that Kieran Gibbs will start at left back, Gallas should come back in place of Toure and Fabianski, as the cup keeper, will play.
I still think the FA Cup is our best chance of silverware this season. We’ve already been knocked out of one cup competition by Burnley and we know they’re a decent side so perhaps there’s a measure of revenge to be taken tomorrow.
And there you have it. Now, if you’ll excuse this pottering won’t get done by itself.
