Sunday, May 5, 2024

Arseblog: Thursday 15th September 2005

September 15th

Well, that didn’t go exactly according to plan but we kicked off our Champions League campaign with a 2-1 win over FC Thun. But didn’t we leave it late? The first half started brightly enough, Bob had a decent effort curl just wide but the Swiss side got into their defensive stride soon after and with 11 men behind the ball most of the time made it difficult for us. Cesc had a good chance which he fired just wide and a Reyes shot slid through the keeper’s legs and Freddie then bundled the ball and the man over the line for a goal which would have stood back in the day but there’s no chance of that happening these days. The main talking point though was the red card for Robin van Persie who can count himself extremely unlucky. The ball was clipped forward, he jumped and touched the ball but his foot was, without question, high. The Thun defender put his head into the challenge and got van Persie’s boot in the face. There was clearly no intent on Robin’s part and he acknowledged the fact his foot was high but the inexperienced referee, in charge of his first CL game and looking to make a name for himself, brought out a straight red to the disbelief of everyone. It was 100% a wrong decision, it’s a big shame for van Persie and it made life very difficult for us in the second half. We weren’t playing well as it was but that made things worse.

However, we took the lead through a fantastic Gilberto header from a Reyes corner. Hurrah. Then they went and scored two minutes later with a hit and hope from a player who was given far too much time in the box. Arse. So it stayed 1-1. Freddie had the sort of chance he normally scores in his sleep but hooked it wide.

Dennis came on for Cesc. Hleb and Quincy came on for Freddie and Reyes but didn’t do much. Pires had a shot blocked. Kolo had a header from a corner screw just wide. It looked all over. Then a long ball came to Dennis in the box. He went for it. Missed it. Then he took the legs out from under the defender, got the ball back and calmly finished. In the 92nd minute, if you please, before celebrating with a Mickey Thomas style fish on dry land type thing. I too was leaping like a salmon in the pub.

You know something? I fucking love last minute winners. They are amongst the greatest things in football. We did not play well. We can certainly improve but you know what? We scored a last minute winner. We can play much better than that but you know what? We scored a last minute winner. And last minute winners make me happy.

Some people have just forgotten how to be happy but you know what? We scored a last minute winner so fuck those miserable cunts. We have three points from our first game and you know what? We scored a last minute winner and Wayne Rooney got sent off for being a stupid cunt and Patrick Vieira got sent off for Juventus. What more do you need to be happy? Enjoy it. Afterwards Dennis Bergkamp reckoned we deserved the result because we didn’t give up, even with 10 men, while the manager spoke about the red card, saying “I think it was the wrong decision, Van Persie did not want to make a foul and tried to play the ball. It was an accident.” We did show good character to keep it going right to the end and that’s a positive because more than anyone the players will know that things aren’t quite clicking for them right now. A late winner will always boost the spirits and that can’t hurt. We know who to thank for the win though. At the final whistle, just before I left the pub, a bloke passed me by and said “We’ve got Dennis Bergkamp.” We do an’ all. Cheers, Dennis.

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