Tuesday, May 21, 2024

Arseblog: Thursday 12th December 2002

december 12th

09.21 – Ray Parlour says he’s ready to stand in for Patrick Vieira, should the skipper’s injury rule him out of Sunday’s clash with the minging Totts at White Hart Lane. To be honest, it might be a good idea to add a bit of er…local experience to this one. Not that our foreign stars don’t appreciate how big a game it is, but Raymondo is a gooner and he’ll do his damndest to ensure that Hoddle’s men don’t get anything from the game, except humiliation and the bitter taste of defeat.

With Paddy almost certainly out, it will be interesting to see who captains the side. Maybe David Seaman, but I don’t like the idea of the captain being in goal. With that in mind, I think we should make Sol Campbell captain for the day, purely for reasons of the team and not to wind up the scummers or anything. Anyway, with Martin Keown likely to start alongside Sol in defence (this is one game too far for old baldy I reckon), he might well get the armband.

Before the Man Utd game, Arsene Wenger said he had no regrets in signing Francis ‘Christy Brown‘ Jeffers instead of Ruud van Nistelrooy. Maybe he was trying to boost the confidence of the Arsenal man, or talk down the danger of the United man, but surely he can’t have been serious. His performance last night against Deportivo was just the kind of goal-poaching, blunderbuss striking Arsenal need at times. Still, at the moment I’d take John O’Shea ahead of any United player – he’s going to be a class act that lad.

Ireland and Scotland’s joint bid to host Euro2008 has been scuppered by Man Utd fan and Taoiseach (pronounced C.U.N.T) Bertie Ahern. After effectively putting an end to a new 60,000 seater stadium which was all set to be built in west Dublin so he could be build the so-called ‘Bertie Bowl’, an 80,000 seater stadium in more nother wester Dublin, the downturn in the Irish economy and the lack of private financing has meant that project is more or less fucked too.

Now Ireland cannot promise the two top quality stadia needed for the bid – despite the fact that Croke Park, a recently redeveloped 80,000 seater stadium is just sitting there. However, Croker is home to the GAA who will not allow any games to be played there except ‘Gaelic’ games, Hurling, Gaelic Football, Camogie and the ritual abuse of altar boys by members of the Catholic Church. Euro2008 looks set to be held in Austria and Switzerland. Nice one Bertie, you stuttering clown.

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