Thursday, March 28, 2024

The futility of existence – plus hats and Champions League

Did you watch Monday night football last night? I did but unfortunately I missed the analysis part, which everyone raved about, and saw the actual football. It was dull. What is the point of Newcastle? I know there are fans of other clubs who read this blog, and if there are Newcastle fans here this morning I mean no offence, but honestly, what is the point of that football club these days?

I’m going to stick some money on them going down because even the players seem to suffer from a lack of understanding about why it is they exist as people and footballers. I suspect many have existential crises at home afterwards. ‘Is this why I was born? Was I fated to end up playing for Steve McClaren? What did I do in a previous life to deserve this? I feel the futility of trying to believe I was anything other than a speck in this great universe’, and so on.

One of them, perhaps, will struggle through it all and write a deep and meaningful book at some point in the future. ‘Why?’ by Jack Colback, or a more lyrical tome from Fabricio Coloccini, football’s answer to Gabriel García Márquez ‘One Hundred Years of Geordietude’, will give us some insight into what this period was actually all about, but no understanding. Because how can any of us understand it?

“Then he made one last effort to search in his heart for the place where his affection had rotted away, and he could not find it.”

All the while the fat man, the man who sells trainers and football shirts, did just enough to keep the whole enterprise going. Chairman Life Support. Mike CPR Ashley. And the fans endure because fans endure but even some of them just be thinking it’d be kinder to take this iteration of their club out the back, tie it to a tree and put a bullet in the back of its head.

Still, the game was lightened up by seeing Carl Jenkinson. It’s always good to see Carl. I know many have wondered about his headgear, if it’s a sign of something more troubling going on, but I for one applaud him for wearing whatever the hell hat he wants. One of the many things I would do if I were ruler of the universe is make hats compulsory for all men.

Part of the problem these days is that we don’t know how to express public joy as well as we did in the past. Back then a ‘huzzah’ and throwing ones hat in the air perfectly illustrated the mood, as well as fostering a community spirit as the chaps had to work together to find their hats afterwards, mixed up as they were when they fell to earth. So if Carl Jenkinson wants to wear a stetson, a fez, a boater, a busby, a deerstalker or a Tam o’ Shanter then more power to him I say.

We’re preparing for Champions League action tomorrow. The team travel to Zagreb today and my early guess is that Arsene Wenger sees this as a game in which he can rotate a little. Not simply to keep players fresh for Saturday’s trip to Stamford Bridge, but also to give some of the players on the bench playing time and involvement in the squad.

We could view it as a way to get the ‘first XI’ more time under their belt, but with six games between now and October 4th, when we play Manchester United, it’s going to be important to use the squad properly. Fatigue affects performances, as we know, and can also be a factor when it comes to fitness, so management of that is going to play a part in getting us through this period successfully.

For tomorrow I could easily see the full backs rotate, with Mathieu Debuchy and Kieran Gibbs coming in for Hector Bellerin and Nacho Monreal. Mikel Arteta could come into midfield, perhaps for Coquelin, with Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain and Olivier Giroud candidates to come into the starting XI. There is a balance of course, wanting to build on Saturday’s result and performance, but also ensuring that we’re in the best shape possible for Saturday’s game.

The manager will meet the press later and although he probably won’t give too much away, we should get some idea of his general thoughts for this one. It does represent a good chance to get our European campaign off to a winning start. While there’s no question of underestimating the opposition, this does feel like a game we should be winning.

Not a lot else happening. We’ll wait for news of Per Mertesacker who has been out of action with illness for the last couple of weeks. If he doesn’t make the Champions League trip, you have to think it’ll be Gabriel that keeps his place for the Chelsea game. The vice-captain was also apparently involved in a bit of a scary car crash the other day, but thankfully came out of unscathed.

If you haven’t yet had a chance to listen to this week’s Arsecast Extra, which looks back on the Stoke win, covering Walcott, Giroud, full-backs, and loads more you can check it out here or listen via the player below. We’ll have all the news throughout the day on Arseblog News, more from me here tomorrow.

Until then.

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