Friday, March 29, 2024

BMF

*boilk*

Monday night shenanigans are not usually my thing these day but thanks to a big Gooner playing drums for this man, I had to have a few drinks last evening. Funnily enough, I shared the same exclusive viewing area as this actor from Game of Thrones.

Is it rude to say that I had Littlefinger in my box last night? It probably is. Oh well. Thanks Kiddi!

As it’s one of those international weeks news is in fairly short supply but there are some interesting quotes from Tomas Rosicky who touched on the defeat to Stoke and what it means for our title challenge. Speaking to the local press ahead of the Czech Republic’s game against Norway, he said:

It was a huge loss of points. On the other hand, there are still ten games left. In the season in which we won the title with Dortmund, we lost to Kaiserslautern a few rounds before the end and in the dressing room we were talking ‘Well, this is over now.’

Suddenly, we won all the remaining games and had the title in our hands.

It’s most definitely a long shot but stranger things have happened, I suppose. I think if there’s any chance of winning the league, then we’re going to have to take 30 points, which means beating Man City, Chelsea and Sp*rs, and not slipping up against shit-kickers like Stoke.

Would I put a great deal of money on it? No, no I would not. I would not really even put a small amount of money on it, but maybe it’s a good thing that there’s somebody like Rosicky in the dressing room who’s been through an experience like that.

I think it’s safe to say that we need to get our arses in gear, and quickly, because while the defeat to Stoke was in some ways unexpected, it’s not as if we’d been playing out of our skins and just had a blip on the day. We’ve been grinding out wins rather than steamrollering teams (Sunderland aside) for quite a while now. And look, I’m not complaining.

I’m good with the grind. I’m good with wins regardless of how they come, but a few of them, particularly against teams of the same calibre as Stoke (just less stampy), haven’t been what you might call convincing. The football has been solid rather than exciting. A bit like porridge for breakfast every morning instead of a bacon roll – it does the same exact thing but much less deliciously.

At some point our breakfast was going to be made up entirely of the dusty stuff you get at the bottom of a box of cereal and that’s what Stoke was (but more stampy). Looking at the fixtures to come you have to worry about what kind of breakfast we’re going to get against Chelsea, City etc, but even the most basic gruel can suffice as long as we avoid the dust.

A scabby 1-0 over Sp*rs would result in a ‘Please sir, can I have some more?’ as we travel to Stamford Bridge wearing swimming goggles lest Mourinho gouge our eyes and give us cancer in the process. Take that into the game against City and we might even have a bit of momentum and that would be like a bit of sliced banana or golden syrup on the top of our oats and then – hopefully – we can return to blog posts without terribly awkward morning meal analogies.

Let’s keep fingers crossed for that. Meanwhile, lumbering oaf Charlie Adam has been charged for his stamp on Olivier Giroud. Our news piece on this must have ended up on a Stoke news feed or something because there are a lot of Stoke fans trying (unsuccessfully, I should add) to leave comments on it. Some of the contributions so far suggest that Arsenal fans are:

– Southern jessies
– Shandy drinking ladyboys
– ‘Loosers’ [sic]
– Grape loving poofters
– Thick froggs [sic]
– Frilly knicker wearing tutu wearers

I see something of a common theme there. Still, we might be any, or all, of those things, but I can assure you that when I wear frilly knickers I do not also sport a tutu. That would be overkill and I am a man of great subtlety in that regard. However, I would like to thank those Stoke fans who have learned how to type by bashing their clenched fists repeatedly on a keyboard for their insightful and amusing contributions.

Finally for today, if you haven’t had a listen to this week’s Arsecast Extra with myself and Gunnerblog then please click right here and get your ears wrapped around 40 minutes of mostly Arsenal chat. We talk about the Stoke game and take listeners questions about Jack Wilshere’s form, that Luis Suarez contract clause story and ponder what might happen if Charlie Adam had sex with a wasp (I think).

Till tomorrow.

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