Arseblog: Friday 14th June 2002

june 14th

17.58 – Bye bye Figo.

Portugal go home after their 9 men lost 1-0 to South Korea. Can’t say I’m too upset – any team that plays that poser Fernando Couto at the back doesn’t deserve to qualify.

I have to say I’ve been surprised at the level of performance from both host nations. The Koreans today looked super-fit and they play nice ball too. Japan as well have improved tremendously from their last World Cup, and with the fanatical support they both have, nobody is going to want to play them.

Jason McAteer is considering retiring from international football. I’m weeping here…

I was thinking during the week of a cool trick to play on people. Imagine if you lived in a small village, and you got everyone together and arranged to sneak off in the middle of the night to some pre-arranged location. Leave half-eaten dinner plates on the table, televisions on, lights on etc.

In your new location you have supplies to last a week or so – so you wait until people notice you’re missing and it all becomes a huge mystery like the Marie Celeste. After a few days, sneak back and when people start asking where you were just pretend you don’t know what they mean and say you’ve been there the whole time, or claim some alien abduction type thing.

When you’re hiding you can all perfect your story so it’s all very convincing. I don’t understand why nobody’s thought of it already……



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