Saturday guff

Saturday quietitude for you as there really is nothing to report this morning. There’s the exciting announcement of this year’s official squad numbers, I suppose.

The only ones we didn’t know previously were Fabianski and Bendtner who will wear 21 and 26 respectively. Eduardo has 9 and apart from that there’s no changes.

The Madrid press are trying to stir up a Cesc to Real story but his agent has shot that down quite quickly. However, he does say ‘This is football and you never know what can happen’, in the middle of it so expect that one small piece to be picked up and run under headlines like ‘Agent leaves door open for Fabregas’ Real deal’. They seem to be more keen on Kaka at the moment though so it’ll be Milan who have to suffer to daily torture of the Spanish football daily.

There were rumours that Mathieu Flamini might stay at the club having decided he’d now be ok with playing at full back. Erm, great. I think he’s a decent squad player and our squad is looking fairly thin at this moment in time. We can’t really afford to let anyone else, apart from Alex Song, go and if the Flamster wants to stay that’s fine with me. He can provide cover for both full back positions and midfield.

Gilberto is a bit cross with Didier Drogba. He told The Sun:

So Drogba said we are out of the title race, did he? Let’s wait and see what happens. He might find himself on the wrong end of a slap in the face as he’s going to his parked car. Guy talks to much, see, and guys with mouths as big as that might as well have a neon sign saying ‘punch me’. He’s got a mouth so big it’d make a bishop kick a hole in the altar boys training academy window.

He then lit a pipe, took a hit from a pint bottle of bourbon, put his feet up on the desk and opened his mail.

And that, my good old friends, is about all there is to say this morning.

Arsenal deny Madrid nonsense – Arsecast 35 out now!

A fairly slow one this morning with the main story centering around Arsene Wenger and Real Madrid. Shit stirring Real President Ramon Calderon threw AW’s name into conversation saying that they had had talks with him about replacing Fabio Capello (the coach who won them the league and got sacked). Arsenal were very quick to rubbish the story, releasing a statement saying:

It is completely untrue. Arsene Wenger has not had talks with Real Madrid and is committed to Arsenal Football Club.

Now, he might well have been talking to Real Madrid but it was probably about José Antonio Reyes, not the manager’s job. Still, Calderon has to make it look as if he’s tried everything before giving the job to someone else. Honestly, it’s such a poisoned chalice at that club. Vincente del Bosque did great things and won the Champions League the season he was sacked. Capello won the league and got sacked. Just make sure you don’t raise the expecation levels too high, Ramon. As well as that he’s currently under investigation due to the scandal over the postal votes which were not counted when the Presidential election took place last year. A key witness said he saw postal votes being tampered with. That key witness is now on the board of Real Madrid. Classic.

AS report that Reyes is in London trying to sort out his future with Arsenal. Real Madrid and Sevilla are said to be interested and they say Arsenal would accept €10m for him despite looking for €14m not so long ago. Real only want to spend €7m and will do everything in their sneaky, tricky power to lower the price with Calderon giving fresh hope to the player saying he could be an important part of Real’s future. José is in Arsene’s office, going:

“Por Favooooooooooooooooooooooor” and Arsene Wenger is all like “Whatever” and he’s like “Mister, pooooooor favooooooooooorrrrrrrr” and the boss is like “Don’t be up in my grill, bitch”.

Sevilla should have plenty of money to buy him after their sales in recent years, their European exploits and the fact they’ll have Champions League football. We’ll just take Dani Alves as part of the deal. Lovely. Nice doing business with you.

Carlos Tevez and Man United? Well, Tevez would be nice and the idea of him going to United is a bit scary but his ownership situation is complicated to say the least. Reports this morning say that United will pay Kia Jorbachian £6m to ‘loan’ Tevez to them for the season. They then have to pay Tevez £100,000 per week which, for one season, works out at over £10m for a player you don’t own and can’t sell. The Premier League are saying that West Ham must be the ones to receive a transfer fee but I doubt, if the deal goes through, they’ll see a penny of it.

Plus I think we might be in the market for a striker still. It’s just a feeling but I’m wondering if Arsene doesn’t see Eduardo da Silva as more of a replacement for Pires, to provide the goals from midfield we missed so much, while still bringing in a striker like Anelka or Martins. Anyway, thoughts on that in the Arsecast.

In this week’s Arsecast, brought to you by OleOle.com who have great coverage of the Copa America at the moment, you’ll find me waffling, the Man in the Bar with his guff, more from David O’Leary and that’s about it. No blogchat this week so it’s a slightly shorter ‘cast.

To subscribe to the arsecast in iTunes – click here. To download this week’s arsecast directly – click here (11.5mb MP3). You can find the arsecast archives here. And you can listen directly below without leaving this very page.

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And that’s the end of that chapter. More tomorrow.

Stan Kranky at Arsenal demands. Boo hoo for him.

Morning all, a relatively quiet one at this early stage.

We’ll start with the Telegraph’s story about how relations between Arsenal and Satan Kroenke are at ‘a new low’. To be honest I’d have thought the old low, brought about by Kroenke trying to buy the club and Tango the rest of the board, was quite enough to be going on with but it seems not.

Apparently the marketing agreement between Arsenal and the Colorado Rapids remains unsigned. Here’s my suggestion. Tell the Colorado Rapids to go fuck themselves because, frankly, nobody gives a fucking shit about them and every time we see a story on .con about them it’s a little bit embarrassing given the circumstances. Plus they’re fucking rubbish. As well as that Kroenke’s commitment to buy half of ITV’s stake in Arsenal’s broadband venture seems not to have been honoured.

The article says that the unhappiness comes from Arsenal’s desire for him to sign a ‘lockdown’ agreement for a year and Kroenke’s not into that. I’d suggest that it’s not unwise for the club to try and keep him where they can see him given the way he tried to buy up the club the last time and if there was any way they could get rid of him then all the better. Can’t see that happening though, unfortunately, so in the meantime we just have to cope with the uncertainty his presence, and that of Double-D lurking in the background in his Speedos having just stepped off his sunbed, brings.

Better news though is the club’s confidence that Arsene Wenger will sign a new deal. The Guardian reports that no successor has even been discussed as they’re sure AW will sign on again. We haven’t yet heard anything from Arsene bar soundbites (Henry leaving, da Silva arriving) so it’ll be interesting to hear what he has to say when he’s speaking normally.

The lads were back for pre-season training yesterday and the first pre-season friendly is in just 9 days. Excellent. Some pics of the training on Arsenal.com.

Freddie Ljungberg was yesterday linked with an €8m move to Fiorentina but again his agent has reiterated his desire to stay at Arsenal. Given how quick we are to castigate players for not being loyal then it seems rather churlish that some people are criticising Freddie for his loyalty. As a squad player, and if he stays fit, then I’m sure he’s got something to offer next season although €8m and £70,000 off the wage bill would be a good move for the club.

Five youngsters have been handed professional deals by the club. They are Nacer Barazite (Dutch forward), Rui Fonte (Portuguese forward), Jay Simpson (English forward and scorer of the first ever hat-trick at the Grove), Paul Rodgers (English defender) and Wojciech Szczesny (Polish goalkeeper). Good luck to them all.

The Mirror reports that Man United are after supposed Arsenal target Carlos Tevez at £20m while the Sun reports that Man United have to sell in order to buy any more players. The wonderful world of transfer rumours.

And that’s yer lot. More, including what could be a short Arsecast, tomorrow.

Da Silva – Cesc – Wenger's new deal and more…

Happy Wednesday to you from a thoroughly miserable Dublin. It’s cold and wet, like an aroused Ice Queen of some kind.

Arsenal yesterday formally announced the signing of Eduardo da Silva with Arsene Wenger saying:

We are delighted to have signed Eduardo Da Silva. He has great qualities and will integrate very well into our style of football. He is a very good finisher and although he is predominantly a striker, he is a very adaptable player.

And I for one would like to welcome our new left back. The player himself was full of the usual waffle a player who joins a club comes out with and you can read an interview with him about how the transfer came about and all that stuff here. He will wear the number 9 shirt which has been worn with such distinction in recent years by José Antonio Reyes, Julio Baptista and, erm, Francis Jeffers. Here’s hoping he fares better than those lads with the quite obviously cursed number. Not keen on that new Premiership lettering either but no doubt we’ll get used to it.

Croatia coach Slaven Bilic and former Gunner Davor Suker both reckon he’s got what it takes to make it at Arsenal. Bilic says:

He’s going to be amazing for Arsenal. He’s very young and very quick. He’s a goalscorer but his game does not just depend on scoring goals. He’s a team player and he opens up space for others.

No doubt he’ll have to pop back over to Croatia and pick up Playstation and B52s albums (he’s a massive fan) and then he’ll be back at the club for pre-season training. Good stuff.

The club also officially announced the signing of 17 year defender Harvard Nordtveit again on a long term deal for an undisclosed fee, but then we’ve known about that for weeks now. I can confirm the fee was around €2m and he’s signed for three hundred years. The deal is so long term that his children will sign for Arsenal at birth.

After hearing from Cesc’s agent yesterday about how he (Cesc) was looking forward to the new season we heard from the player himself. Talking about how much of a success he thinks Thierry is going to be at Barcelona he spoke about his future, saying:

The summer is now over for me. I am going back to pre-season training very soon at Arsenal. My team. I am staying in London.

Awww, I love that little guy. His team is like my team! Sometimes players need something like the departure of a big player like Henry to move up a gear themselves and take more responsibility. I expect that to happen with Cesc and the likes of Robin van Persie as their importance to the team grows.

The Sun is reporting that Arsenal have offered Arsene Wenger a new 4 year deal worth £75,000 a week and they want him to sign it by the end of the week. They also say we’re still after Obafemi Martins but are battling with Juventus for his signature. They also probably have some pictures of boobs. Still, a new deal for the boss would provide the stability that’s needed at this moment and deprive some journos of their current favourite Arsenal story.

Paul Merson, he really makes me laugh when he’s on Sky, but he’s such a negative Nancy. He talks about being worried about Arsenal and while I can see where he’s coming from his natural pessimism shines through in this article.

Bakary Sagna has pleaded with Auxerre to let him move and Arsenal is his ‘dream’ apparently. He’s a strange talking guy. He says “Auxerre directors ask for a lot of money, I am not lucky. It is capital for my future”. Quite. Still haven’t figured out how he fits into the plans, if he genuinely is a target, but we’ll wait and see.

And that’s about that. I was going to mention Jeremie Aliadiere and his comedy accent but who are we to question the wisdom of Gareth Soutgate.

Finally, a happy 4th of July to all our American readers. Remember, if you light a firework and it doesn’t go off you have to nudge it along the ground with your nose to make it work again!

Until tomorrow, Arsefans.