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Well, the title race this season is certainly an interesting one. United went back to the top as they walked all over Portsmouth last night. It might only have been 2-0 but had they really wanted to I reckon they could have scored a half-dozen. Sol Campbell at the back for Pompey looked about as interested in playing football as I am in eating a scorpion’s testicles washed down with a big glass of panda jism.

Chelsea too kept the pressure on with a 1-0 win over Reading. Liverpool, meanwhile, lost 1-0 to West Ham so any faint hopes they had of being part of the challenge are well and truly gone. The Mugsmashers have never sacked a manager mid-season but Benitez is really under a huge amount of pressure now.

In Arsenal news Theo Walcott doesn’t reckon a loan move would be as good for him as staying at Arsenal. He says:

Every day at Arsenal, I train with some of the best players in the world. My game is obviously going to benefit most from being around these people. With respect to other clubs, that’s not going to happen anywhere else. That’s why I want to push myself every day with Arsenal and try to get into the first team as often as I possibly can.

I’d tend to agree with that. I think he’s better off with us than elsewhere. Not simply from a football point of view but from a personal point of view. Let’s face it, all the other clubs in the world are full of cunts. Why would we send him off to work with cunts every day when he can stay with us and only have a couple of cunts to deal with?

Cesc has been singing the praises of two of his team-mates. Firstly he’s bigging up Adebayor, saying:

Emmanuel is one of the best in the world, without any doubt. You can not fault him in any way. He works, he defends, he chases the centre-backs, he goes behind, he can play to feet, he has a good first touch and a good technique. He has improved amazingly and for us I don’t think we could live without Adebayor right now.

Repeat that last sentence again and again and again because it’s the truest thing ever. Had Togo qualified for the ACN then we’d be somewhat buggered. Then Cesc spoke about Mathieu Flamini (NDP). He said:

I’m a big fan of his. He’s hyperactive, on and off the pitch. I don’t know how he does it but he has so much power. With his encouragement we play better. He has so much passion for the game. He enjoys it and he hates losing. He is a very big player for us.

Aw, I can imagine Cesc sitting at home writing off the Mathieu Flamini fan club then waiting ‘up to 28′ days for his membership card and enamel badge to arrive in the post. In fact, I think I’ll write to them myself. I love Flamini.

Arsenal have confirmed that Abou Diaby has signed a new deal with the club which runs until 2012. Good news and let’s hope we can see more of the Diaby that played against Newcastle in the games to come.

Arsene Wenger has described 15 year old Luke Freeman, our January transfer window MEGASIGNING, as ‘a very interesting prospect’. That he’s 15 means we can forget about him for a couple of years then write him off completely by the time he’s 17 and a half because he’s not Maradona. And speaking of Maradona he apparently visited the Newcastle dressing room after the game on Tuesday night. Poor bloke, obviously back on the hard drugs and booze and licking toads. Sad, so very sad.

It is transfer deadline day so we can spend all day scouring the newswires to find out who we’re not signing. What fun we’ll have.

That’s about it then. Just ahead of the Man City game on Saturday I believe a load of the Dublin Supporters club are meeting in Gibney’s in Malahide (home of the Highbury Jumbotron) to watch the Man City game. If, like me, you can’t be arsed going all that way there’ll be a few of us in the Woolshed on Parnell Street. More details in tomorrow’s action packed Arsecast.

Right so, have a good day. More tomorrow.

Sometimes in football it’s the things you don’t expect that give you the most pleasure. I don’t think there was an Arsenal fan anywhere who would have predicted the emergence of Mathieu Flamini (NDP) as one of the players of the season. It looked like he was on his way out in the summer, thankfully it didn’t happen and we’ve been reaping the rewards since the first game of the season.

While others have seen their form dip a little bit he has been the model of consistency, week in week out he’s been excellent and last night against Newcastle was probably his performance of the season. He made one, scored a belter, tackled, chased, harried, ran up and down the pitch and was pretty much flawless in everything he did.

In the 40th minute there was some slick work between Hleb and Cesc on our right which set Flamini (NDP, FFS) free and his cross found the head of Adebayor who put away his 19th goal of the season. Just moments after that Newcastle had one of their few dangerous moments, helped by a linesman who failed to flag two offside players, but who was back there to make the vital tackle? You know it, it was that man Flamini (NDP, JHC).

Into the second half and with about 20 minutes to go Cesc fed Flamini (NDP, PP) who was about 30 yards out and slightly to the left hand side of the goal. He took a touch then launched a rocket of a shot into the top right hand corner. Reminiscent of Thierry’s goal against Man City a couple of seasons ago but from further out. He’s always been capable of getting goals but they’re usually as a result of him arriving late into the box and scrambling it home. It was certainly the best goal of his Arsenal career and absolutely no less than he deserved.

The third goal came when Nicklas Bendtner, on for Eduardo, beat the offside trap and laid the ball off to Cesc who slammed it home with his left foot. It’s good to see Cesc back on the scoresheet, his last goal having come around three months previously. That’s 12 for the season for him now and our 3 goals came from just 4 shots on target in the game.

As with the game on Saturday Newcastle hardly troubled us at all. Defensively we were very solid, Diaby had one of the best games I’ve seen from him in a while, Adebayor can’t stop scoring but the focus today should be on Mathieu Flamini (NDPNDPNDPNDPNDPNDP). It was the kind of performance that makes the fact he hasn’t yet signed a new deal all the more frustrating. He’s just 23 years old, he’s proving himself to be a very, very good player and it would be a big shame if he didn’t spend the best years of his career at Arsenal. He’s got his mates in the side, the fans love him, he’s now a vital part of our team so whatever’s holding it up, from whichever side, I hope it gets sorted and he signs a new deal. Come on Arsenal, come on Mathieu, sort it.

Afterwards Arsene spoke about Flamini (NDP etc) in glowing terms, saying:

He’s growing from game to game and getting stronger. He scored a great goal, but I like the time he took and the composure he showed on the cross for Adebayor.

We want him to stay, he wants to stay, it’s a question of patience and good positive discussions. I am hoping to finalise it. I am not especially concerned, because I believe what he tells me.

Well, that all sounds quite positive but I’m still going to keep my fingers crossed and I may even go out and slaughter a rabbit so I can use one of its feet as a lucky charm. Actually, couldn’t you keep all of his feet and four times the luck or is there only one lucky foot per rabbit? I think I may have strayed from the point a bit. The crux of the matter is that we’re back on top of the league. It might temporary as United entertain Portsmouth this evening and I suppose we can but hope that the south-coast retirement home inmates can do us a favour.

It was important not to slip up last night and the boss is impressed with the team and its title credentials. He says:

We can be patient, move the ball and keep our concentration, not making a mistake. Last year we were not capable of doing that. They can dig in, and I feel we are much more mature than last season.

And onwards and upwards we go. Next up is Man City on Saturday, a difficult game but one we should go into with a lot of confidence. We’re playing well, we’re scoring goals, not conceding too many and it appears that just like Madonna, we’re getting into the groove.

Abou Diaby talks about Lassana Diarra but says he won’t follow his ‘brother’ out of Arsenal. He was good last night, I thought, and there are unconfirmed stories that he’s signed a new deal that will keep him at the club until 2012. With Gilberto unlikely to remain at the club beyond the summer and Denilson still raw he could well find himself getting games in central midfield next season. If he were to go into them with the same enthusiasm and energy that he showed last night then I don’t think we would complain too much.

And that’s about that for this morning. Let us bask in the glowing glow of being top of the league again and let us light votive candles and set about the slaughter of rabbits to ensure our bonne chance.

Until tomorrow, Flamfans.

Yesterday started with a rumour. A new club was in for Jonathan Woodgate. It was Arsenal! We’d agreed a fee! He was ’set to sign’! We’d ‘beaten Sp*rs in the race!’. Arsenal blogs confidently announced we’d be signing him/having lunchtime talks with him/giving him a billion pounds a week! Opinion was passed on how he’d fit into the team! Then Arsene spoke. He said:

I do not know where that story came from. There is no truth in it at all. We have never been in touch with Middlesbrough about Jonathan Woodgate.

And across the land humble pie was warmed in the oven, headlines were modified and the delete key was used hither and thither. Personally I’m quite happy we didn’t sign him. Leaving aside his dubious past we already have too many players who spend more time in the treatment room than on the pitch. I’m sure Robin van Persie and Tomas Rosicky would have liked a new friend to talk to but if they’re that desperate I’ll buy them a puppy, or something.

If you don’t count this season Woodgate has played an average of 13 games a season for the last 5 years. At least he can swap stories with Ledley King as he’s since signed for Sp*rs. Frankly the whole thing smacks of an agent trying to get the maximum possible out of a team desperate for defensive signings. When you have Kaboul and Dawson you’d be desperate too. I hope he breaks in half during his debut, the zombie looking cunt.

Right, onto matters more important and there’s a game of football tonight against Newcastle. One of the things I suspected Keegan might do there was lessen the cunt quota but it seems he’s decided the best way to deal with someone like Joey Barton is to bring Denis Wise on board. If Joey needs any advice on travelling by taxi I’m sure the man who just walked out on Leeds can help him.

From our point of view we’re without Rosicky but everyone else from Saturday is available. Tomas’s injury is thought to be short term though (until the next one), while Robin van Persie is back in training but still unlikely to hit the first team for another two or three weeks. You’d have to think Adebayor and Eduardo will start up top, Almunia will return in goal, Sagna at right back and the rest of the team more or less picks itself. Three points would put us top of the league as United don’t play Portsmouth until tomorrow night. It’s a good chance to just put a little bit of pressure on.

And speaking of United the draw for the 5th round of the FA Cup was made and it’s United at Old Trafford. Typical, but a tasty fixture all the same. Chelsea, as usual, paid someone to ensure they got a lower division side.

Jens Lehmann is now officially our FA Cup goalkeeper and Arsene Wenger is hoping that the final will be his last game for the club. Jens himself is being Jens Positivo, saying:

I believe in this team’s ability to win things and I  believe in my ability to be a part of that.

How awesome would it be if the FA Cup final was his final game. And he saved a penalty like in 2005. And scored the winner. After running the length of the pitch in a manner which would have made Lionel Messi sit at home and play with himself with excitement. I’d like that. Jens scoring, I mean. Not Messi wanking. Bleurgh.

The Online Gooner has a piece that every Arsenal fan should read.

Finally, just a reminder that if you haven’t voted for Arseblog in the Best European Weblog category for the 2008 Bloggies there’s still time. Go here, select Arseblog, then submit. It couldn’t be easier, and thanks.

Right, busy morning ahead. Here’s to three points tonight. More tomorrow.

Another Monday rolls around and it’s fairly quiet to be honest. Saturday’s win against Newcastle was fairly uneventful and none of our players went after one of his team-mates with a meat cleaver which would at least give us something to talk about.

It’s not like the good old days. I can remember seeing Tommy Caton (God rest him) chase George Wood straight out of the ground and up and down the Avenell Road during a game against Villa after the keeper had made some less than savoury remark about the defending. Only for Don Howe’s intervention I’m sure Caton would gone to town on the keeper with the plank with nails in it that he always carried in his shorts. Now that’s passion.

Adebayor says he was trying to motivate Bendtner against Sp*rs. Whatever his skills as a footballer I don’t think he’s got a post-game career as one of those inspirational speakers that companies hire to make their workforce work harder. However, I do think he could break the world record for the most words ever in any rap song.

Kolo Toure is set to miss the Ivory Coast’s game against Mali with his groin injury. I am a bit doubtful that he has access to the kind of treatment he’d have at Arsenal so let’s hope his injury isn’t too serious. Or that he isn’t made play despite being injured. Or that a killer monkey breaks into his hotel room and goes at him in a monkey frenzy. No man deserves that.

Setanta Sports have decided the Sky Sports wonderkid to Arsenal reporting is the way to go. They link us with with some young Bosnian chap called Edin Dzeko, who sounds like a panda’s sneeze rather than a footballer. They quote Arsenal’s coach Boro Primorac, who says:

He is the kind of forward that could succeed in The Premiership. It is still not certain whether we’ll sign him, but his performance gets better every day and if you want to sign him you would need to pay good money.

I say we pay them with bad money, just for the laughs. The kind of money that hangs around on street corners with other bovver boys and makes semi-crude comments at pretty girls as they pass by. The kind of money that puts its feet up on bus seats and stands outside a pub to have a cigarette but blows the smoke back inside to rebel against the smoking ban. Yeah.

How nice to see Sp*rs return to form against United yesterday. For me the big conundrum about Tuesday night was how any team that regularly plays Michael Dawson can ever win a game of football. He is comedy gold though.

And finally if you have an iPhone or an iPod Touch (with the latest update) you can install an Arseblog webclip on the home screen of your phone. Simply browse to Arseblog in Safari, click the + and choose ‘add to home screen’. This makes your iPhone or iPod Touch 74% cooler than it was previously. Cheers to the Man from East Lower for tips ‘n’ stuff.

Right so, I’d best do some work today. I have a lot of work to do. I need more coffee. Perhaps I should get a killer monkey to do it. Or a less aggressive kind of monkey. But without the aggression you lose all the enthusiasm. It’s a tough one to try and figure out so early in the week, eh?

Sometimes the FA Cup throws up some shocks. Yesterday was not one of them. Despite a couple of first half scares (Clichy headed one off the line and a Taylor header that went over) the game was pretty much all Arsenal, with Newcastle not threatening at all.

Theo Walcott must have been looking forward to playing up front with Adebayor but that plan was thwarted when Tomas Rosicky, who appears to be made from the same brittle material that crafted Jeremie Aliadiere and Darren Anderton, was taken off after just a few minutes. Eduardo came on up front and Theo played right, in front of Justin Hoyte who did well back in his favoured right back position.

The scoring was opened in the second half when Eduardo’s fantastic shot came back off the post, rebounded to Adebayor who then slammed home a brilliant left footed shot. He added to that later on with a great second, picking the ball up inside the Newcastle half, going past a number of their players (and he was helped very cleverly by Eduardo who blocked off the last defender), into the box and he rifled home a shot off the despairing dive of the last man. The game was well and truly over then and whatever has happened in the week this is exactly why Adebayor is in the team ahead of Bendtner. The big man is on fire at the moment.

The game was sealed with an own goal and it was our old pal Nicky Butt. Haha. 3-0, no less than we deserved really and the nil was all Newcastle merited. A repeat performance on Tuesday in the league would be perfect. Overall though it was a good response to the Sp*rs game. The back four were rock solid, Senderos in particular had an excellent game and he’s now beginning to find his form again. It’s good to see. Gael Clichy is just fantastic every week, in injury time he was going full pelt down our left to try set up an attack.

Cesc looked more like the Cesc of a couple of months ago, Flamini was superb alongside him, and up top Adebayor and Eduardo are a very good combination. They seem to link up well and the form Adebayor is in at the moment is just fantastic. I don’t think anybody expected the kind of goal return he’s provided so far this season. So, into the 5th round we go.

Afterwards Arsene said Newcastle made it difficult but wouldn’t be drawn any further on the row between Adebayor and Bendtner. You can read more of his thoughts here. Adebayor’s take on the incident is as follows:

It’s all finished because we are all footballers and we all play for Arsenal and that is more important. You need sometimes to talk and wake ourselves up, and that’s what we’ve done on Tuesday, and at the moment everything is behind us and is finished.

Heh, I like the way he says ‘at the moment’, but it’s good to hear nonetheless.

In other news Jens Lehmann still hasn’t given up hope of getting back into the Arsenal team. He did well yesterday, although he had very little to do, and I noticed a nice hug between him and Adebayor at the end. Jens looked impressed at the Togonator. Sort of like ‘Ahh, so you are a mad bastard too. We are brothers, you and I.”

Carlos Vela played 84 minutes for Osasuna last night but couldn’t prevent a 2-1 loss to Sevilla.

And that’s about it. I have to go play football now and I am tired. It’s very early for football, isn’t it? I think I might retire. When the idea of sitting around in a dressing gown eating toast is more appealing than going to play football you know it’s probably time.

Till tomorrow.

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