ARSEBLOG News Review

‘Tis the season to be merry for all Gooners out there.

It’s a winter wonderland, with Arsenal sitting top of the tree. The Gunners gave all their fans an early present of three points against ‘Boro, exactly as I had predicited.

I’m gonna stick my neck out and make another prediction.

I think Arsenal will BEAT Chelsea but LOSE to Liverpool. Against a violent and manic West Brom the lads will do well to escape with 3 points and all their limbs intact. I fancy a DRAW in that game.

I’ve got big plans over this Christmas, readers. Have you?

The synopsis of my new book has just been accepted by my publisher.

It’s gonna be called ‘The Confessor’. - the basic premise is that I will dress up as a PRIEST and hear the confessions of the top players and managers in the game.

And then reveal their secrets to the world!

Don’t worry, readers. I plan to reveal the juiciest, tastiest morsels I discover here on ANR.

I’ve already got a priests costume I can use. I borrowed it off my old mate BING CROSBY when he was in that film about an orphanage. The one where he sang about swinging on a star.

He played a man of the cloth in the film, but off the set he was a helluva evil character.

An alcoholic speed freak, he was mean to his women and cruel to ANIMALS. White Christmas meant only one thing to Bing - DRUGS POWDER!

But he possessed immense charm, and the sweetest left foot you ever saw. But his engine was gone from all that pipe smoking.

If he had played the game he would have been an elegant ball player, not a grafter.

I’ve gotta go now readers. Although I’m a Zoroastrian buddhist, I still celebrate this pagan festival each year.

I meditate for a while, and for the twelve days of Christmas I sleep in a MANGER.

A Christmas thought.

Have any of you astute people noticed how much Kanu and Clarke Gable look alike?

Merry Christmas