Tuesday, March 19, 2024

Xhaka pictures leak as Pardew’s dancing wins United the cup

Morning.

So Manchester Utd won the FA Cup yesterday. 10 man Manchester United won the FA Cup. 10 man Manchester United managed by Louis van Gaal for the last time won the FA Cup. And they deserved it. I’m sorry Crystal Palace fans, I think everybody was up for the underdog – that’s the normal way of things.

Gigantic, underperforming, in transition, and playing Fellaini on purpose Man Utd, are still one of the ‘big’ clubs, and everyone who isn’t invested in them in some way wants to see the big team lose in the final. If it’s Arsenal v Piddlecup Rovers, everyone wants Rovers to win.

Even if Piddlecup were, let’s just say, managed by a guy called Alec Purdue who looks like a creepy uncle and who is as likeable as a wart on the top of your willy, people would still want the small team to win. Just because. That’s football. We all know it.

The first half was dull as dishwater. Crap frankly, and watching the half-time bit as they tried to make out the keeper saving a scuffed Juan Mata shot was some top quality fare was amusing. At least Mark Clattenburg gave them something to talk about by being absolutely rubbish at refereeing. And remember, this is a man who is taking charge of a Champions League final between Atletico Madrid and Real Madrid next weekend. I stand by this completely:

Many people said that this would be a scenario they would pay for. Anyway, the second half was still a bit crap, some subs were made, then Jason Puncheon scored a fantastic goal to put Palace 1-0. What a strike it was and his frustration about not making the starting XI was obvious in his celebrations. Then the cameras cut to Alan Pardew and he did this.

adexsports_2016-May-22

In the words of Ben Kingsley: No. No no no no no no no no no. No. No no no no no no no no no no no no no. No.

There are things that should not be seen, ever. Like, your Da in the nip, your poems from when you were a teenager, and Alan Pardew dancing. I get that goals in cup finals are things to be enjoyed, but if you must dance, wait until the game is over and you’re dancing with the cup, otherwise you could look like a massive twat if you don’t hang onto that lead.

And lo and behold, the universe did look at Pardew dancing and it said ‘No, we’re not having this,’ and crafted a goal for Mata less than three minutes later. He wasn’t dancing then. And while I can only speak for myself, I really wanted him to lose the game because of it. Sorry Palace. It’s not that I was ‘up’ for United, I just couldn’t bear the idea of a man who would do that touching the FA Cup as a winning manager.

And so, in extra-time United scored again and held on and won the cup, and then it emerged that Louis van Gaal is getting sacked. He clearly knew it too and whether it was leaked by United, or more likely by the massive grandstanding sociopathic egomaniac who is taking over from him, it was a shabby way for it to happen.

He clearly hasn’t been the best manager they’ve ever had, but sections of the press have done little but ridicule him throughout his time there. It’s little wonder he’s had a pop back now and again, at the ‘fat man’ and the rest. The laughter as he left the press conference with the cup was poor form really, and now United can prepare themselves for an era of poison and endless self-aggrandisement with a trophy on the shelf.

I think The Man from East Lower put it rather well:

Anyway, that’ll make next year ‘fun’, and I suppose it’s been some time since everyone has been able to properly hate United. This will sort that out quick smart.

Elsewhere, photos of Granit Xhaka having his Arsenal pictures taken leaked yesterday, with the club said to be less than pleased by it. Apparently it was one of his entourage posting them on Snapchat or something. Either way it shows that the deal must be done, or at least very close to it, and we get a first look at next season’s home kit in full.

The shirts leaked last week, if you remember, but now we get to see the red socks and all. It’s becoming increasingly difficult for football clubs to keep things under wraps these days, but from a fan’s point of view, it’s great once you can learn to filter out the nonsense.

So, all we do now is wait for the signing to become official – then wait until they put into place new procedures for further arrivals to ensure THIS CAN NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN. But relax Arsenal, it may not be ideal, but it’s not Alan Pardew dancing. There’s some comfort in that.

Have a great Sunday, more from me tomorrow.

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