Daily Archives: August 3, 2011

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August 3, 2011 posted by Tim Stillman

60,000 pitchforks climbing Everest

Tim Stillman Column

Another week, another set of worries, pugnaciously poured out of every sweaty orifice of the interweb. The forums are alive with the sound of unamused-niks. On Sunday, some of that discordance made its way pitch side to the ears of the manager. This last weekend of course saw Arsenal tragically, horrifically toss away the Emirates Cup in a result that history will surely mark as the nadir of our 125 years.

I dunno, what would Big Tone and Ray Parlour have done about this, eh? Aside from drink ten pints of lager and have a whizz on someone’s driveway, naturally. I’m being melodramatic of course, but then again, I am an Arsenal fan so what do you expect? The weekend brought us the Emirates Cup and the first thing to say is that both games represented a good challenge for the team. The Boca game exposed us to high quality opponents who play a different style. Whilst New York Red Bulls were only ever intent on parking the bus – a challenge we will face more than once in more competitive home fixtures next season.

Of course neither game really went the way we wanted it to if we’re to view the games competitively. I realise the club and the sponsors try to present the games through a veneer of importance, which might explain why so many saw them through such a prism of intense scrutiny. That’s not to say there weren’t worrying signs of history repeating, with leads tossed away in both games, possession recycled ad infinitum without sufficient penetration etc. However, for their to be boos at the final whistle, of a friendly, that is drawn, is an hysterical reaction in my book – symptomatic of the malcontented mindset that has come to characterise our support of late.

Arsenal Fans Riot

Arsenal fans were unhappy at the final whistle

There are those that argue the boos weren’t about the result or the concession of a meaningless trophy. The boos were apparently about the club’s transfer policy and another summer of inaction. So let me posit you this, if Kyle Bartley had turned that ball over his own crossbar, or else Arsenal had replied immediately with an 89th minute winner, would there still be cat calling at the final whistle? I’d bet my bollocks to a barn dance not one individual would trouble their larynx in that scenario. Not. Fucking. One. Yet neither of those scenarios would have told us anything different about the team or the club.

The rights and wrongs of booing your team have been done to death and I’ve neither the inclination nor the sanity to produce a meditation on that here. Suffice to say it’s not something I tend to do myself. Not because I’m some moral gladiator, but because, to be honest, I think it just sounds kind of childish. The aural qualities of it put me in mind of a toddler who has been presented with a plate of broccoli. I concede that if you pay your money, you’ve got the right. I guess I just don’t see the logic of making your home ground a hostile environment for your own team, different strokes for different folks I suppose.

However, booing a friendly does strike me as kind of pathetic. It’s difficult to replicate the intensity of a real game in a non competitive match; particularly one in which a plethora of substitutions are made prior to the final third of the game. If we twirl the periscope and look around at other pre season friendly results, I ask you, would Manchester United lose 8-2 to Marseilles in a Champions League game? Would Liverpool lose 3-0 to Hull City in the League Cup? There are issues to be analysed for the coaching staff, but let’s not make a chuffing great Everest out of a mole hill.

The flipside of this of course is that, if the club didn’t realise it before, they are now acutely aware that they have some way to go to get the supporters onside. The club have created a good deal of that pressure for themselves. I wrote on these pages back in May that pressing ahead with a price rise at a time when supporters were at the threshold of their disenchantment was a risky PR move. The club handed 60,000 pitchforks to a baying mob.

The upshot is that those being asked to reach a little deeper into their pockets will have demanded tangible gratification in the transfer market. In other words, evidence that those extra funds were contributing to an increase in the quality of the product. The transfer market looks very tough at the moment; there hasn’t been much activity anywhere and it seems Arsenal have been working hard both to bring players in and move some on. But punters are less understanding when asked to part with more of their pound sterling and that’s entirely understandable.

Following the transfer market has been a frustrating experience for Arsenal fans this summer, but there again, the way the media saturates us with misinformation; it’s all become a lot like Pavlov’s Dogs. They ring a bell and we all roll over look good little pups and have our bellies tickled. For instance, on Tuesday, in the space of 7 hours we had heard that; Juan Mata had agreed personal terms with Arsenal, that Juan Mata had committed his future to Valencia, that Arsenal had missed the deadline for his release clause and that Arsenal had had a bid for Mata turned down.

It’s crazy making and it’s foolhardy to get sucked in by it so consistently. The next time some goatee sporting twerp, let’s call him, Guillem LeBlag, outs some nugget of “inside information” please refer to the bullshit-o-meter before going doolalley. Alongside a prospective deal for Mata, Arsenal’s answer to Prince Philip, Mr. Hill-Wood confirmed the club had bid for Phil Jagielka. I have to say I find the link to Jagielka more enthusing than the likes of Samba and Cahill. I know the party line is that we want a caveman of a centre half who feasts on the blood of oxen, but playing at centre half for a club like Arsenal is different to sides in the lower reaches of the league.

The reality is for defenders at Arsenal is the same as it is for goalkeepers. You’re going to be under deployed for large parts of an average game. That sets a different kind of challenge. Let us use the goalkeeping example as a paradigm and take Manuel Almunia. His best performances in an Arsenal shirt were Champions League matches at Old Trafford and the Nou Camp respectively. These were games in which the team were under the cosh and Manuel was deployed consistently. They showed that he has good qualities as a goalkeeper.

His issue arose in games where he was likely to be standing idly by for 85 minutes plus. When he had that one shot to deal with, he came up short. This of course is where Seaman excelled. Take the 2003 F.A. Cup Final. Sod all to do for 89 minutes. Brett Ormerod smashes a shot towards the top corner in injury time and Seaman’s concentration remained at its utmost. It’s similar for defenders and I have my reservations as to whether it’s a challenge the likes of Cahill and Samba would be able to meet. Jagielka I think, has that nous to his game. A cool head. But I guess we’ll wait and see how that deal pans out.

We’ve another big week ahead. Tomorrow sees the club’s annual Members’ Day, which I will have the pleasure of attending in Club Level. In the event that anything vaguely exciting happens, I will be tweeting live in between mouthfuls of salmon and watercress sandwiches. I think it’s fair to say all eyes will be live on the photo call there. Don’t forget that Friday morning at 11am sees the draw for the Play-off Round of the Champions League qualifiers. Inevitably this means I will be wandering around the Great British Beer Festival that afternoon on the blower desperately trying to book flights to Kazan. Until then, Booooooooooooooo! LD.

Follow me on twitter @LittleDutchVA

Arseblog, the arsenal blog
August 3, 2011 posted by arseblog

I never thought I could feel so free-eee-eeeeeeee

Morning to you, shall we start with some good news this morning?

It’s not much, but it’s something. Jack Wilshere’s injury is not thought to be too bad and he reckons he should only be out for a couple of days. This will then allow him to recover in time to injure it properly playing for England next week in the round of senseless international friendlies that take place.

I mean, what better preparation for a new season than to disrupt training the week before the league kicks off by having players called up for their countries and traveling thither and yon to play stupid games that nobody cares about? Only stupid people with stupid heads, like Stuart Pearce and Lily Allen’s dad, probably.

If we’d had any sense we’d have ruled Jack out for the season to ensure he missed the international then cited the work of some healing lady who used the blessed placenta of the holy goat of Ballymebollix as the reason for his sudden recuperation. Still, as long as we have these problematic things called countries we’re going to have to put up with internationals.

In other news it’s not looking promising for the Phil Jagielka transfer. Despite swathes of rumours and necks being put on the line online about his arrival The Mirror says that he’s ‘ready to snub’ a move because he’d prefer to stay at Everton. I have no idea how true that is, although the little bit of scouting round some Everton websites suggested he is indeed very happy there and in that part of the country, and that it would surprise many if he left. And if that’s the case, if he likes playing for Everton and feels he’s earning enough then fair play to him. Can’t argue with that one bit.

Of course it leaves us still in need of a centre-half and The Mail say Arsene is going to send Steve Rowley to watch Birmingham’s Scott Dann this weekend. Now, I may not know the ins and outs of transfers and scouting but it strikes me that if we had a genuine interest in a payer we’d probably have scouted him well before now. There’s a suggestion that we’re looking to see if he’s recovered from an severe hamstring strain but wouldn’t the fact that he’s playing at all be an indication of that?

And not that I’m being overly picky or anything but Scott Dann? He sounds like a bit part actor who had the odd role in stuff like The Greatest American Hero and Simon and Simon. He was probably a weak chinned guy who was the boyfriend of some girl who fell for the main character, or a really shit villain. I know, you can’t judge a man by his name, but signing a centre-half called Thor Smashington or Ironfist Murdereyes would at least give the player some immediate awesomeness as he tried to adapt.

It may be just guesswork on the part of The Mail, or indeed pure fiction, but if there is even a hint of truth in it, it suggests we’re not quite on Plan A when it comes to our potential centre-half signing. Or Plan B. Or C. There are only 26 letters in the alphabet, sadly. Or Plan Z19. I would hope we’re not quite flying by the seat of our pants as this would suggest but it’s hard to be too confident considering we’ve had all summer to sign a defender and haven’t done so yet.

The Cesc thing rumbles on and on and on with no sign of anything happening. Some outlets are reporting a final bid from Barcelona of £35m + add-ons, The Times this morning says Barcelona’s final, take it or leave it, offer is £29.6m + £5.4m. In which case I would say “You know what? We’ll leave it, thanks for your time, buh-bye now!” and if they ever rang me again I’d simply blast an air-horn down the line until they got the message. Cheap-arsed cunts.

That’s just me though. I suspect Barcelona’s relentless cuntery has worn Arsenal down (Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?) and it wouldn’t surprise me if it all moved this week.

Arsenal’s team photo takes place tomorrow and much will be drawn from the presence, or lack thereof, of Cesc and indeed Samir Nasri who is apparently back in Man City’s sights. The thing is though it’s just a photo and we’ve had players appear in it before who haven’t started the season. I mean, will Bendnter be in it? Eboue? Almunia? And if they are or they aren’t does it significantly impact on their futures? Bottom line is that time is running out for all these players this summer and thus far the much hoped for revolution has been vague evolution and little more. Let’s see what happens.

In other vague and spurious transfer news The Express reports that Joey Barton has his heart set on an Arsenal move (sorry, no link because they use those horrendous auto-playing videos which are designed to increase ad revenue but which probably have a negative effect because no fucker will link to your site as long as you have them), while The Mirror says Mauro Zarate’s agent is in London to talk to us and Sp*rs.

Another Spanish youngster linked, this time a young Real Madrid striker called Jose Rodriguez.

Going back to the team photo there was a competition yesterday to give you, and your mini-Gooner, a chance to be part of the proceedings tomorrow. The answer to the question was b) Gunnersaurus – although many people feel Chompy Joe is a far superior name – and the RNG has done it’s thing.

Congratulations to Stuart Laidlaw, I’ll be in touch this morning with more details. Commiserations to the rest and thanks for your entries. More competitions to come.

And that’s about the size of it for this morning. Have yourselves a pleasant Wednesday, more tomorrow.