Friday, March 29, 2024

Chelsea preview, Sunday round-up

*boilk*

Morning all. A quick one ahead of today’s laugh a minute, let’s hold hands because we’re all such friends, I really like you because you’re rich and successful, encounter with Chelsea.

Arsene Wenger has never beaten Jose Mourinho (on the football pitch anyway. I’m sure he’s beaten him around the chest and kidneys with a bag full of oranges – at least in his dreams) and he’s confident that today will be the day that changes. He’s also played down Chelsea’s claims that they’ll be the biggest club in the whole wide cosmiverse. He reckons despite their recent success they lack the fanbase to be considered a properly big club. Actually, I don’t give a fuck about any of that.

Cesc Fabregas has had his customary dig at Chelsea’s playing style and says the Arsenal team are not afraid of anyone. He says:

We’re never intimidated by any team, even if they are supposedly the best footballers in the world. I don’t worry about the opposition. In football, I believe you can beat anybody, as long as you give 100 per cent. I’m not sure who is the biggest club in London, Chelsea are a good side but they don”t play the type of football that I would like to play.

They’re certainly not as dour and machine like as they have been in the past but I get his point.

Amy Lawrence writes in the Observer about our defence today which has an average age of just 21, coming up agains the power and experience of Cuntier Cuntba and Shevchenkunt will be a real test for them, while Arsene Wenger says words have been had with Emmanuel Eboue about his tendency to exaggerate every contact and roll around on the ground like some kind of ground roller. Well played, Arsene.

Freddie Ljungberg talks about how Chelsea can go out and buy established stars while Arsenal’s finances mean they have to buy and develop young players. Tomorrow Freddie will talk about how night follows day, summer is warmer than winter and how drinking too much rum gives you a cunt of a headache.

And that’s about it. Required today is a performance like we had at Old Trafford, like the one we had against Sp*rs. Fight, energy, committment and we can’t be afraid of them. This is a Chelsea side that has become more attacking and become slightly more vulnerable because of it.

No idea who he’s going to play in midfield. I’d love to see Baptista get in amongst them but I reckon the boss will use him from the bench.

Anyway, I’m going to get the papers, some breakfast and a few dozen paracetemol. Fingers crossed today for a good game and a good result. Of course I’ll happily take a shit game and a good result. I suspect you would too.

More tomorrow. Come on you gooooooners.

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