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If there’s one thing I hate more than no news it’s news that I don’t like. And by that I don’t mean I don’t like it because Arsenal are supposedly in ‘big trouble’ with FIFA because of a Newsnight investigation. I mean I don’t like it because things like financial agreements and partnerships and documents that have been tangoed bore the fucking ring off me.

The BBC say Arsenal may have had a controlling interest in Beveren (Update: Arsenal Times has a good piece on the Newsnight programme here).

Arsenal have denied the accusations strongly. Some other bloke says Arsenal still owe money on Kolo Toure. Double-D’s signature is on documents all over the place and there’s some suggestion that Arsene Wenger has acted improperly by investing in the Ivory Coast academy run by his friend Jean Marc Guillou.

Apparently we could be kicked out of the Champions League but that’s sort of like saying Boy George could have gone to jail in New York for 50 years over that cocaine thing. The media likes to dish out the strongest possible punishment. Some bunch of fuckers in suits will sit around, examine the documents and make some kind of decision.

To me it all seems like a bit of a storm in a teacup. It’s hard to imagine the club putting themselves in a position where they could be punished as severely as the BBC is making out. That’s not to say the club haven’t bent the rules as far as possible. Let’s be realistic, like every other football Arsenal are not whiter than white, but we’ve got enough nous to keep our noses clean although perhaps a little smudged.

FIFA President Sepp Blatter said when contacted by the BBC:

Let Arsenal give the Football Association their report. It will be then be reported later to Fifa but for the time being I am not in a position to make any comments about what punishments or sanctions should be taken against a club

Which, for Blatter, makes a lot of sense. As the always sensible Goodplaya says it’s best not to judge either way too soon but personally I think this is only getting the mileage it’s getting because there’s fuck all else going on.

It is funny though how the BBC are poring over a petty little £1m when if they decided to look into Chelsea’s finances and where they came from with as much energy they’d dig up a much more interesting story.

In other news Ashley Cole is again being linked with Chelsea despite their interest in Roberto Carlos. Swap deals with SWP are mooted but apparently Arsene would prefer straight cash. No doubt he’ll want in in unmarked bills left on a bench in Finsbury Park in a sports bag.

The boss also talks about new signing Tomas Rosicky and as expected he’s the replacement for Robert Pires. The boss says:

He is a little bit similar position-wise to Robert. He can play in Dennis Bergkamp’s role, on the left, in a 4-3-3 or central. But he is slightly a different style. He is an accelerator of the game, a guy who can create things, see things quickly and whose best years are ahead of him.

Grand, that’s the kind of news I like. Idle transfer speculation and chat about our new signings. Come on, Arsenal, get rid of this Beveren story off the front page with a couple of signings.

You know it makes sense!!!!!!